Category: Sausage Trail Reports

It’s a daunting task to be omnipotent about sausage. It’s even harder when you live in Chicago, where you have hundreds of hot dog stands. And, harder still when you see that the local craft butcher shops are going strong. Sausages and hot dogs are everywhere.

Somehow, these small businesses are avoiding the Walmart asphyxiation death trap wherein neighborhood and small-town stores go belly up. Hot dogs, sausages and butcher shops are more prevalent than ICE agents in Chicago.

In the 234 square miles of Chicago, there are 1800 hot dog stands – or 7.69 hot dog stands in every square mile.

During WWII Stalin said, “You have to be a very brave man to be a deserter in the Russian army.” If you were caught deserting, you were shot immediately.

To open a hot dog stand or sausage restaurant in Chicago, you must be brave. There is a ton of competition – you better be brave and smart to survive in the hot dog-sausage biz.

Wurst Behavior is a shining example of the small competitor entering a vicious arena and coming into battle with above-average armaments. Unlike Portillo’s and that level of diner where imagination and hand-crafted ingenuity stops at the front door, Wurst Behavior welcomes you to the art of the sausage.

The storefront is not going to wow with Taj Mahal presence. Sit down, grab a menu and if your reading skills are above that of the average American (8th grade) you’ll quickly surmise that you have your choice of artistic works to choose from. It’s like the Art Institute is offering things to put into your mouth.

Take your time with the menu. Do you pick one from the sausage category, one from the brat section, or take a chance on one of the offerings in the handmade hot dog section? There is no Vienna hot dog to be seen. This could be a jarring realization to many Chicagoans – so be forewarned.

As you feel analysis-paralysis set in, make your choice easier and just stay on the left side of the menu. Pick one, go with it, and be ready to justify it to your companions.

My dining companion has quirky tastes. It’s rare her taste buds and mine overlap or align. She raised an eyebrow when I suggested the BBQ Brat, but I was quick to counter with the compromise that any appetizer she chose I’d go with. Pierogi was selected and I commended her on her brilliant selection. If the sausages and dogs are handmade, the pierogis had to be as well and, besides, Jordan our cordial server said that was the case. (Please avoid pissing Jordan off by calling him the Wurst server. He’s a good guy and doesn’t need to hear this for the hundredth time.)

We placed the food order. They have a variety of beers, wine, and booze. It was past noon but before 3 PM so I ordered a Pilsner Urquell. The Wurst Cocktails were tempting – I couldn’t decide between the Chicago Fire (mezcal base) and the Midwest Dram (bourbon base), and a nice glass of Wodka (polish vodka) on the rocks. When you have three booze choices, opting for a pilsner lets you know the superego was winning out over the id. We’d be at the Bulls game for 4 PM tip and Mr. Id would make bad drinking decisions there.

The pierogis arrived and we shut up. They disappeared faster than the Bulls’ playoff hopes. They were some of the lightest pierogis I’ve tasted.

Meaning, 98% of all pierogis have a half-life of 100 years in your stomach and 200 years on your hips. You can look it up – Guinness has recorded that no pierogi has ever escaped earth’s gravitational pull. There are some recently unearthed tombs in Warsaw discovered to have edible pierogis in the pocket of King Casimir III.

I’m not sure why these little savory pillows were on the appetizer list. But I guess they had to go somewhere on the menu. They were gone so quickly we didn’t pick up the phone to take a picture. When food anticipation overcomes cell phone camera usage you know something special has happened.

Before we burped out our thanks for the pierogi, the BBQ Brat showed up. We have pictures of this and only a Cinemax screen could do the brat picture justice. We were trying to avoid the death-by-over-eating syndrome and asked for the brat to be halved. Even being cut in half didn’t diminish the commitment it was going to take to eat all of this.

I didn’t have a golf ball with me but I’m pretty sure the diameter of the brat was larger than 1.68 inches. Plus, the bun and toppings of cole slaw and BBQ pork exceeded the size of the average male human mouth (which is 2.15 inches). In short, when presented in front of you, this work of art is asking you to do something physically unnatural.

These thoughts come to mind once you get past the stunned staring you do at the brats facing you. This is where sausage art becomes participatory art.

You are the canvas. The oils and paints are in front of you. You are going to apply this bun contained sausage to your face hoping that you can unhinge your jaw, knowing that it is very likely sausage shrapnel will decorate your face and shirt. Mr. Id is jumping on your shoulder cheering you on with profanity laced declarations. You realize you watched too many Russ Myers movies during your pubescent years.

Time stops. You have entered a hand-to-hand battle zone. You don’t have three hours to battle this monster – tip-off is at 4 PM.

The hand-to-mouth battle is failing. The brat and condiments are winning. Failure suggests a Plan B and you attack with fork and knife hoping no one you know sees your failure at unhinging your jaw while sausage shrapnel covers the table and most of your limbs.

The battle lasts longer than you want, and your life will go on. You’ve made headway and miraculously half the brat is gone, cole slaw scattered here and there. You sense some relief from the battle and then Jordan parachutes in three platters of sausage:

He’s adding more uranium to a hot core. We’re already past critical mass and the shrapnel wounds are affecting judgment.

We look up from the feast before us and thank Jordan for these lagniappes. I undo the belt and realize tourniquets only save lives when they are tightened. We plow on. It’s straight knife-and-fork nibbling now. There is no way we can pile three more sausages down. Fitting ten pounds into a five-pound sack is magic we can’t do.

We waive the white flag of the doggie bag brigade. We take the partially eaten bevy of sausages, condiments, and sausage buns with us. The car will smell heavenly for days.

The after-battle report is succinct:

Postscript Note:

We want to credit Art Wnorowski and Gosia Pieniazek for bringing Wurst Behavior to life. This is a place of handmade craft art. It is another example of fine dining without white tablecloths and overpriced wine lists.

They weren’t at Wurst the afternoon we stopped by. It was four days before the opening of a new restaurant, Spoko (Spoko Chicago), in Lincoln Park.

Seeing that they also have Pierogi Kitchen (Pierogi Kitchen Chicago), Ella’s BBQ (Ella’s BBQ), and Earl’s BBQ (Earl’s BBQ), it looks like we have serious food artists taking some market share from the big guys.

Our Rating: Three sausages out of three sausages.

4009 N ELSTON Ave, Chicago, IL 60618
(773) 654-3122
www.wurstbehavior.com

According to Statista, the worldwide sausage market is approximately $110 billion. In the US, they site the sausage revenue to be $6.4 billion for 2024. Americans eat a lot of sausage. From a macro point of view, we see many choices in a variety of sausages across all the 50 states. This is a diversity fact we can take pride in.

At a more human level – a you and me level – it’s an interesting thing to ask about how many home sausage makers are there and who are they?

I asked some AI tools (CoPilot and Perplexity) but their artificial intelligence answers did not yield any concrete demographic insights. Do home sausage makers skew older and grayer? Do first generation citizens make more homemade sausage than second generation? And do men make more homemade sausage than women? You can suspect so but actual data would be more useful.

If you own the Sausagefest.com website, you have these types of questions.

It appears as of 2024, that there seems to be a marketing data hole about this slice of the American public. In 2024 this seems hard to believe when we can track eyeballs and viewers of pornography and women who travel across state lines for pregnancy health. But there is a paucity of data about home made sausage makers in the U.S.

When you can’t find the data you’re forced to go collect the data yourself or find those sausage artists who are practicing the craft at home. Fortunately, the network of friends who like sausages is a welcoming group and invitations to sausage-related events come our way.

On October 27 I had the good fortune to attend a sausage making party that has been going on for forty years. I heard about the event for several years and am grateful to the brothers who run it, Steven and Jordan Tepper, for the invite.

As you might deduce from the pictures, they were not running the show back forty years ago. The founding-inspired sausage artist was their father, Michael. He was one of the founding Executive Chefs, alongside his close friends Donnie & Wilma Baggio, and was that kind of guy who could make a lot of things happen – whether in the business world or at a grill.

Size and Cleanliness Does Matter

Jordan and Steven follow their father’s advice to make no small plans. Their sausage making day starts in the morning with 240 pounds of pork shoulder. They have a dozen friends and family that make up a dedicated team. The event takes place in one of the cleanest garages I’ve seen. And their attention to clean and healthy conditions are a foundation for this forty-year event.

If you are doing home made sausage making, the Tepper’s attention to clean appliances, knives, tables, bowls and mixing vat should be followed. The old adage is to not witness the sausage being made. But when you see the healthy steps taken to ensure quality you can see that modern home sausage making is far better than current political sausage making.

As the first-time attendee I also saw the first-time-ever type of tragedy that could stop sausage making in their casing. Their dependable old Torrey meat grinder broke its blade, and the sausage ship was in dead stop mode. Within fifteen minutes the team of friends and family turned into a sausage SWAT team. One team started dialing local butchers to help. Another team was sent to go purchase two new grinders. A third team started to open wine bottles since early drinking seemed to be called for at this point.

This multi-team approach should be a lesson to any other homemade sausage making event. Especially the aspect of having far above average wine to have on hand when emergencies happen.

When you have a team of focused and smart people problems get solved quickly. The “Find a Friendly Butcher Team” had the winning approach. The local pro ground 240 pounds of pork shoulder for them. As you can see in the photo below, that’s a lot of sausage.

Once back in the garage the mixing of meat with seasonings began. The sausage deliverables this day was Italian sausage made into three types: mild, hot, and extra hot. Steven kept the mixing and sausage assembly moving, while Jordan was grilling in real-time. His quick taste tests would cycle back to the process team so more key ingredients could be added. Was it too salty, not salty enough, too much fennel, not enough…etc.

The folks involved in this sizable sausage production all knew each other. Almost all were University of Illinois graduates, and I lost track of who the cousins were, and which guy was married to which guys sister. There was a great deal of camaraderie along with just giving a crap about making really good sausage.

A couple final notes for other homemade teams, adding a big screen to the party to watch sporting events while making sausage is a great idea. It’s also important at the same time to find the appropriate rock & roll music to mix your meat with.

As the first-time attendee it was obvious that this was a celebration of friendship and family that has many more years on it. The only thing that might add to this festival is the right name. Given the U of I alumni that were involved, I have this for their suggestion box. Why not brand the event – The University of Illinois Alumni Sausage Making Team of Chicago?

Once you get that news out, how many other U of I Alumni sausage making teams from around the country appear? And when does the first official University sanctioned cook-off happen? Probably during a football or basketball weekend. U of I grads are everywhere. This could go global.

Somewhere, Michael Tepper is smiling at this big idea.

Postscript Note:

Steven and Jordan sent me home with some sausages. On a coldish Sunday afternoon in November, we broke out the hot sausage and added it to our spaghetti dinner. Without any prompting, Kathy said, “This is some of the best Italian sausage we’ve had.” I couldn’t disagree. The heat was there but not too much. The fat-to-meat ratio was excellent. Just as importantly the fine grind of the sausage gave you as easy to consume texture. This quality grind also avoided the awful discovery of that “chunk of something” you find in many store made sausages.

Our Rating: Three sausages out of three sausages.

Some folks go to Mecca, others visit Rome or Jerusalem, and pagans go to Vegas. If you are even a somewhat serious sausage fan you need to visit this nice town a few miles west of Madison, Wisconsin. Why?

The National Mustard Museum is in downtown Middleton. While not every sausage requires mustard its one of the great natural combos – mustard on brats, mustard on hot dogs, mustard on polish sausage, etc.

The Museum has over 5000 mustards (probably more every day) and enough distractions to keep you entertained for thirty minutes or a couple hours.

The good news about going to Middleton is there a few more reasons to go here besides the museum.

For dinner you want to change paces from the mustard realm. Wander a few steps over to Louisianne’s Etc. It’s a very solid restaurant doing great New Orleans style food. I didn’t see any sausage items on the menu but the Maple Cured Duck was very good and their wine list was well above average, with more reds to select from than whites.

For a different dining spot, you should also check out the Hubbard Avenue Diner. The diner is open for breakfast, lunch and dinner and the food is classic American solid.

If you’re in the area during good weather months and you are a golfer, you should not miss the Pleasant View Golf Course. It really does have beautiful views.

Once you’re done with golf head directly to Capital Brewery. This is a serious brewery and any beer fan should make time in their schedule if they are anywhere near Madison. Capital Brewery products are readily available in the Madison area, if you can’t get to Middleton – which would be your loss.

We taste a lot of sausages. A lot of sausages we taste we don’t talk about. Why bring mediocre experiences to your attention?

You see mediocre too often: republicans, democrats, reality tv, tv religion, interviews with football players, interviews with ceo’s. None of them worth capitalizing. They engineer enough wasted time onto themselves.

Eating great sausage, finding great sausage is not a common thing. Its like cable television: 265 channels and most of it forgettable.

Before common media induces your next coma of mediocrity and you find yourself in downtown Chicago, head over to Bin 36. The tourist guides might identify it as a wine bar. But wine bars aren’t known for their long-lived runs. Bin 36 has been around since before 9/11. Hard to believe but because its more than a wine bar it has legs and keeps delivering.

Thankfully they also have no television so it’s easy to concentrate, read a great wine list and have conversation without seeing a ticker symbol roll across the screen. Jimmy and Roberto were working the bar the evening we were visiting. They were great wine stewards and great with suggestions.

Bin 36 has a substantial wine list, wine flights, cheese flights, – – enough flights to carry your imagination to France, Portugal or Chile. Full entrees and very comfortable family room seating is also a plus. With some attention to detail you can also find sausages on the menu.

There are only two sausages on their menu. Both sausages are MUST try sausages: Cottechino sausage and Toulosse sausage.

The Cottechino can be found in the appetizer menu. The sausages were served on top of perfect polenta with a fried egg on top.

As a sausage purist I moved the egg to my partner’s plate. The Cottechino is easily some of the best sausage you will ever taste. I talked with the Sous Chef AJ about it. It’s a pork sausage but it will remind you of the best filet mignon. This sausage starts melting in your mouth when your fork touches it. The polenta was a very good base for the sausage and a tasty launching pad for the sausage.

Maybe it’s really butter disguised as meat, but order the Cottechino and experience an amazing taste sensation.

Warning: there’s not a lot of sausage in this appetizer. So before you start beating up on your dining partner about who gets the last past piece of sausage, pick up the menu and find the Toulousse sausage.

The Toulousse is housed in a cassoulet. They humored me and I got the Toulousse without all the rest of the cassoulet. . If you like beans and that stuff, fine. The sausage is fine naked. Where the Cottechino suddenly vaporizes in your mouth, the Toulousse has a slightly chewy texture and a smoky flavor. AJ confirmed that smoked bacon was part of this sausage.

AJ told me the Toulousse was also hand made. Chef John Caputo is the master of these recipes . John wasn’t working the night we visited. Maybe he was attending Zen sausage school, but obviously a master artist is at work here.

I could tell you we had wonderful wines: a 2009 Beckman Cuvee Le Bec, the 2009 Domaine Jean Touzet Chardonnay, and a 2010 Vina Tabali Viognier. But, that wouldn’t surprise anyone – you would expect this kind of variety and quality from Bin 36.

Here’s a crazy idea: if they can do a cheese flight and wine flight, why not a sausage flight. Maybe pigs can fly. Until that shows up on the menu, find the sausages where you can and order them.

Bin 36
161 North Jefferson St
Chicago, IL
(312) 995-6560

Cabo San Lucas is at the tip of the second longest peninsula in the world, the Baja California peninsula of Mexico. Despite what you may have heard, Sam Hagar didn’t discover Cabo.

Cabo has many magnets. The whale watching is superb. The seafood and dining choices are first rate. The contrast between the blue of the ocean and the desert is stunning. And, the local residents make you feel welcomed.

On this trip our main focus was whale watching and relaxation. But, since Sausagefest never sleeps, we wanted to pass on some new finds while we were in Cabo.

Our home base was the Las Ventanas al Paraiso resort on the Sea of Cortez side of the peninsula. Fabrice Guisset is the Executive Chef there and a great ambassador for the hotel and the local cuisine. A trained French chef in a seaside resort is a dangerous combination – but in a very good way.

He graciously shared with us one of his recipes that marry local seafood with sausage – Dark Beer Steamed Mussels with Chistorra (see our recipe page for this).

But what is Chistorra?

Chistorra is a pork-based sausage of Basque origin. Small in diameter its length can be one to three feet in length. The Chistorra we had in Cabo was the Mexican version. Which meant that the paprika of the Basque version was absent. Instead of the paprika there was chili pepper added. This New World version is worth seeking out and trying. When you think Chiorra think of it like a better breakfast sausage alternative. Except, Chistorra can also be found as a tapas bar treat – its more than a breakfast staple.

On a Tuesday morning at the Ocean Grill Fabrice treated me to a Chistorra tasting with French and Mayan touches. Accompanying the Chistorra was Fougasse. Being French, Fabrice took this bread from Provence, added some olive oil, and cooked it in the adobe oven with the sausage.

Sausage and bread is a traditional combination in many cultures. What brought this combination to new heights was Xni-pec salsa. Xni-pec (a Mayan word for a dog’s nose) is a simple Mayan salsa with dramatic impact. Fabrice’s interpretation of this dish followed this recipe:

Ingredients:
• One half habanero pepper (no seeds) diced
• One cup of red onion finely diced
• Juice of half a lime
• A pinch of sea salt

Let this mixture set in a bowl for at least an hour; stir occasionally. For those more adventurous you might want to use a whole habanero pepper, but also double the onion and lime ingredients.

What does the “dog’s nose” have to do with the salsa? Common conjecture is that your nose will run like that of a dog. A graphic and sobering image – enough said.

As always, take care with working with the Habanero pepper. Gloves for your hands and eye shield are worth investing in.

That cautionary note aside, this is a simple but amazingly good salsa. Teamed with the Fougasse and Chistorra this is a breakfast meal that will quickly wake up your taste buds.

The Las Ventanas al Paraiso resort is part of the Rosewood group of fine hotels and resorts. Its one of those high quality, high personal service hotels. It also has a tequila – sushi bar on the premises that also requires a visit.

Click here for more information about Las Ventanas al Paraiso.

With Sausagefest.com being a Chicago based organization (I use that term loosely) you might think we get Chicago or Midwest centric.

Unlike ESPN (the Eastcoast Sports Network) we actually cover sausage artists from other parts of the country. Before we get overwhelmed with all the Midwest sausage season, lets start the summer grilling season in our nation’s capital.

DC Sausage Sampling

Our nations capital is always an amazing place. The museums, shrines, and memorials are all worthwhile destinations. If you’re an American citizen it’s difficult to not have a feeling of pride as you walk around The District. Driving the district generally will upset your stomach so we suggest walking and using the Metro. Since you’re in DC for food never jeopardize your stomach resources on driving.

Like our country, The District can also delight you with the diversity of sausage artists. If you’re not in to diversity, DC Is not going to help your narrow views of reality.

Start a Saturday morning in DC at the Eastern Market. The Capital Hill neighborhood is east of the Capital. You can walk it if you’re at the Capital. Head generally southeast and look for the market. The blue or orange lines of the Metro drop you a short walk from the market.

The Eastern Market has been around since 1873. US Grant was President then and given his eating and drinking habits we’re betting he was here.

Grab breakfast at Market Lunch. There is much to choose from – crab, seafood, grits, biscuits – all available with eggs served a number of ways. Their coffee is above average and the line moves pretty quickly and friends are made as you wait.

After breakfast, stroll or waddle (depending on how much you ate) down the indoor aisle and go to Canales Quality Meats and Union Meat Company. The sausage variety is large. Make a few selections than think about how you’re going to cook them once your back at the hotel.

The Eastern Market is a smaller market than Cleveland’s East Side Market or Seattle’s Pikes Market, but still a classic community center. Walk back to the Capital and take the Metro and work off breakfast as you head to Georgetown.

In Georgetown the sensory overload for adults gets into the danger zone. The watering holes are plentiful, dining superb and even the running stores are cool. So in keeping with cool and sensory overload go to Dean & Deluca.

Stay focused on sausages. This will not be easy because surely the path to hell is paved with the food distractions that will entice you and distract you. Move to the sausage case quickly.

Here you will find offerings from Mann’s Sausage Company, Creminelli, Fra’Mani, Olli Salumeria, and Molinari. For a sausage lover this is a feast of opera like portions; too much, too amazing, too good to believe – and there’s no one singing in German. Its actually better than opera.

The major players at Dean & Deluca are: William Hughes and Bobby Boyd. William serves as Manager and sausage ambassador/savant. He was a great host the morning we visited. After you’ve been done in by the sausage bounty do not go get one of their great coffees, but head back to the wine area.

Even if you’re Mormon you’ll want to go here. The devilish angel in charge of wines here is Bobby Boyd. Bobby will speak of nuance and depth of flavor for this Duckhorn or that Ramey. Before too long you’ve lost balance and you have a case of wine – done in by salami and great red wine. Suck up the cost and enjoy.

Afternoon naps are a good thing after visiting the Eastern Market and Dean & Deluca but fight the urge, get the coffee drink now and head to Fairfax, Virginia.

This will be a car ride but it’s worth it. You want to head to the Farmer’s Market near the courthouse on Main Street. Once you’re there and the coffee has re-balanced you, find Il Bastone. Just get there before 1 PM on Saturday since the market closes then.

The artist in charge is Alex. He has artisanal sausages from a United Nations recipe book: Argentina, France, Italy, German, Spain and others. These are 100% natural sausages, home made to his artistic eye – and more importantly, worth trying.

Enjoy Washington, DC and remember that politics is not sausage making. Sausage making is art; politics is butchering.

Addresses:
The Eastern Market
www.easternmarket-dc.org
225 7th Street SE, Washington, DC 20003

Dean & Deluca
www.deandeluca.com
3276 M Street NW
Washington, DC
202-342-2500

Il Bastone
www.ilbastone.com
10500 Main Street — Main & West & Page Streets (between Wells Fargo and Courthouse)
Fairfax, VA 220

Bass Lake Taverne – Inn
Chardon, Ohio

Cleveland has the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame, the first place Indians, the West Side Market and many good sausage makers. As a prime example, The Sausage Shoppe has gotten years of praise from both Sausagefest and Anthony Bourdain’s review of the Shoppe a few back.

Cleveland has the urban ethnic diversity to make it a very friendly sausage city. You can even see this sausage Mecca’s karma extending beyond the city proper. Thirty miles east of Cleveland in Chardon, Ohio the Bass Lake Taverne Inn is worth visiting.

Even if you’re not on sausage craving mission, BLTI is worth a visit. It’s an old Inn and tavern and can accommodate weddings and major social events. We were there strictly for the drinks and food, and we’ll be back.

The Taverne (a funky spelling for tavern that spell check hates) has personality and warmth and far from the cookie cutter restaurants cluttering Cleveland’s suburbs. It has Happy Hour every day, real Lake Perch (fried, Thank god), and one sausage dish that is a must try.

Lets’ call the dish Wild Game Sausage Alfredo. I may be off a hair with the exact entre name. They have a generous happy hour – a waning charm of the American bar scene – and my notes suffered from happiness I imbibed. But, regardless of naming, “a rose is a rose” by any name and its an interesting piece of edible art.

I got the recipe after some strong-arming of Kim Kingzett, the Taverne’s Manager. (See the recipe tab.) Adding and abetting Kim, we benefitted greatly from our server Kyle suggesting the sausage dish. They were also kind enough to let me go kitchen side where Nick was the Sous Chef for the evening. Kyle Scanlon is there most nights as their Executive Chef.

The basic premise for the dish is pretty simple. Start with the mindset that your taking Fettucine Alfredo to sausage heaven and you’re going to be there to enjoy the ride.

The Taverne used Bison Sausage and Pheasant Sausage from Valley Gourmet & Game. Both sausages wee lean and flavorful – and you could tell the bison from the pheasant.

How many sausages do you eat where you get a Hawaiian brat (why?) and a chorizo from the same vendor and the flavors overlap with each other? Let the ingredients speak out for themselves – shouldn’t this be obvious?

But going a bit further into this deconstruction of a wonderful dish, you also note a healthy does of whole grain mustard, Romano cheese, veal stock, smoked gouda, red onions, wild mushrooms, and heavy cream (of course). The dish won me over not for its being Fettucine Alfredo with sausages but that it combined the natural affinity of sausage and mustard and letting that natural pairing play out in an excellent pasta milieu.

It’s also the kind of dish that lets you enjoy Free Range Wine Drinking (FRWD): white, rose, and red can all find their place next to the plate.

The Westside Market & Great Lakes Brewery

No visit to Cleveland would be complete without hitting the Westside Market and the very close by Great Lakes Brewing. The Westside Market started back in the 1800’s and the building it occupies now (with the classic clock tower) dates from 1912.

The Market has over 100 different vendors and the food displays are really a testament to business, tradition and culture all working together to offer you a food emporium with a lot to delight the senses. Cleveland too often is made a joke but the Market is a historic jewel any city would love. (Chicago, a much larger great lake city by comparison has nothing like it. A faux French market at a Chicago train station is at this point the best this city can do.)

There are more than 25 meat vendors and virtually every one has their own sausages to tempt you. Many of the vendors are now offering healthy meat choices: free range chickens, Amish meats, or no growth hormone meat. Clearly, the healthy eating message has gotten to these vendors.

It’s hard to describe the feeling of this meat and sausage cornucopia. I still suffer from sensory overload, which I’m clinically describing as “sausage gridlock syndrome”. Watch for SGS to be in the Physician’s Desk Reference soon. Symptoms include:

• Feelings of sausage inadequacy
• Irritable bowels – from tasting any or all samples offered
• Possible running nose and red eyes – from hot sausages or tears of joy
• Inflamed amorous feelings – from dirty sausage talk you hear everywhere (maybe it was just me, but I’m sure this would be verified by other observers)
When you finally get to the point where SGS has you on the verge of vertigo you know its time to leave the market. The universal antidote to SGS is alcohol and less than a city block away you can find Great Lakes Brewing.

I’ve been drinking Great Lakes offerings since 1988 and am very glad to see beer brewing being an economic engine in this Cleveland neighborhood. The 1980’s was a grim period for Cleveland and Great Lakes Brewing was a great idea that was well executed. It has won many awards and the neighborhood is looking better and better.

On the afternoon we were there the Indians were in town and the bar was packed. In addition to many beers, ales and stouts to pick from you can also get sausage dishes – either appetizers or entrees.

The Bratwurst entrée with cabbage and pierogis could conjure up images of a lead weight being digested. The brats were a fine grind sausage grilled – a bit different from the rougher cut Wisconsin version one sees. Brats are generally grilled as these were and browned perfectly. The pierogis were closer to the soufflé type then the small hockey puck versions. The three mustards accompanying the brats ranged from to sinus reaction strong. Try all three and have one of the cold beverages handy.

It might be a stretch to say the Rock Hall of Fame is rivaled by the allure of Cleveland’s sausage attractions, but it’s a city to put on your sausage map.

The Sausage Links to Follow:
The Sausage Shoppe
Anthony Bourdain, TravelChannelTV video clip:
Valley Gourmet & Game: (Under Construction)
Westside Market:
Great Lakes Brewing:

Dateline Cancun, Mexico – January 2009

Treat yourself to some time in Cancun. The sea has a beautiful turquoise hue and it’s hard to think it’s the same Atlantic Ocean as the water you see in the Carolinas or anywhere northward. The geography mavens will say it’s the Caribbean but its still Atlantic water. With the economy of modern society falling quickly into an unending stream of bankruptcies and company lay-offs it seemed like a good time to cash in the Marriott points and United Points before both companies go the way of the dodo. So the search for sausages went south of the border. Here’s what we found after extensive research, well somewhat extensive.

No Sausage Shops
We couldn’t locate a single freestanding sausage shop in the immediate Cancun area. I even asked Manual who was our bar guy at the Casa Magna swim up bar. He’s been with Marriot for 15 years, lives near the airport and knows the local scene.

“Senor, I don’t think we have a shop like that in Cancun. Yes we have chorizo but jew can get that at supermarkets or Wal-Mart.”

Ok. Wal-Mart sausage – I felt my stomach turn over so I ordered another Blue Death Zombie. Maybe Manual was being cagey, saving the good stuff to the native sons. So I called over my interpreter, Kate, who has a better command of Spanish that I do. I whispered my thoughts to Kate who smiled, spoke Spanish to Manual and explained what I was looking for. Manual smiled and nodded. Manual smiled and nodded a lot when Kate was around. It was Tuesday and she had on a turquoise bikini, which made the melon bikini she wore on Monday look baggy. They chatted for a bit and Manual said in what I was beginning to hear as damn good English, “ Senor, I understand the Sausagefest idea and I didn’t think you were asking me to an all guy party. But I just don’t think we have that type of sausage place here.”

“Jew want another Zombie, senor?”

Maybe it was the Zombie – he was slipping between tourist region pidgin English and Midwest news anchor English. So I ordered uno mas and decided there was no upside to interrogate the alcohol vendor. Kate swam away, I fell into thought and Manual turned back to his blender. This research was hard work but I wasn’t minding the zombie haze. I suspect there’s a decent sausage maker in the area but nothing popped up on our radar this trip.

2. Xel-Ha – A Paradise with Sausage
About 90 minutes south of the Cancun ‘region tourista’ is a 250-acre tropical park called Xel-Ha (say shell-ha).
Amusement parks, anything Disney, and family parks are low on my priority list. Between passing a stone and going to Great America neither offer any moment of joy. My arm was twisted by Kate and Kristen (the translation team) and I found myself actually enjoying this tropical park. First, you have to highly respect any park that has an open bar ready for you from breakfast time to when you leave. We got there about 9:30. The bus ride put me to sleep and as we headed to the breakfast area I was thinking of an eye opener. Xel-Ha puts on a great spread and it’s been long time since I had breakfast with 500 people all wearing swimwear. I like the idea of breakfasting in my swim trunks. There was no shirt or tie to catch food scraps. And, you could peruse the swim suit models with a tequila laced Bloody Mary (when in roman, etc.). There was enough talent around to give Kate and Kristen some competition. Aside from the beautiful tropical setting, you also don’t want to miss breakfast at Xel-Ha because they have ‘chorizo y patat’ (potato) on the buffet table. This is rib sticking stuff and has all the flavor and carbs you need to get the day off to a better than average start. You get a second pleasurable sausage option by helping yourself to the salchicha (sausage). The breakfast sausage back home isn’t like this. It was excellent by itself but better with the huevos and the Tequila Mary. I was surprised at how lean and flavorful it was, but then again I was using my back home yardstick of breakfast sausages. In the US we’re migrating our way out of bland breakfast offerings. I’ve cruised through hundreds of breakfast buffets where the sausage offerings are grayish, fatty and far from a recognizable meat form. If you go to Xel-Ha, you’ll see that the sausage taste like meat. It sounds simple but they got it right. You would be a very rich gringo if you made a dime for every time you had an American breakfast sausage that was a little grey container of fatty fluids.

So to recap: tropical park of beautiful scenery, open bar, plenty of snorkeling good times, floating in an inner tube for the real lazy and good sausage. I should also mention that the rest of the food offerings were better than average and the wait staff was super friendly and attentive.

Slight correction – maybe its more than 90 minutes to get there. Traffic is subject to the same crap we get in the states with construction, accidents, etc. I will say that I don’t understand why the highways I travelled on in Mexico had speed bumps every ten miles or so. You get rid of those hideous things and your cruising speed will go up.

You can find out more about Xel-Ha at: www.xelha.com

Limoncello
When you feel like getting dressed again, get over to Limoncello. It’s in the hotel zone of Cancun a little south of Senor Frog’s and a little north of Plaza Flamingo. Once the sun goes down, you’ll be dining waterside at a spot with a nice sunset view. The sausage offerings you’ll want to consider are these: Gnocco fritto con salumi: This is a dish of deep fried gnocchi puffs served with Italian cured meats (Prosciutto, coppa and salami). Deep-fried pasta usually isn’t a hit with me but I threw out concern about my cholesterol level once I was south of the border. I thought my entrée was the winning one at the table. Definitely try the pappardelle with Italian sausage. The red sauce was light; the sausage was lean and flavorful. The waiter was newly from Hungary and he thought this was one f the chef’s best dishes. The translation team sampled my plate enough to chisel my portion down to appetizer level. So we had a unanimous opinion for one of the few times during the week.

The nighttime ambience was beautiful, the entrees very good, and the service staff attentive. I wish that their wine list were more moderate in price. I had a glass of white to start and a glass of red with the entrée. It was everyday stuff. If I wanted to drop more dough on a bottle they had decent selection of South American and Spanish reds. I’d recommend you slosh down a wine of your choice before you get there then settle in for whatever wine you like when you get there, if you’re watching pesos.

You can find out more about Lemoncello at: www.limocellocancun.com

La Habichuela
Although Sausagefest is about all things sausage we also enjoy a fine sausage-less meal where we find them. La Habichuela is a white tablecloth restaurant in the old city of Cancun. We took a bus from the hotel (a great way to get around Cancun and cheap) walked a few blocks and found this four star place. This is a well-run first class place. Our party of four was smiling and nodding from start to finish. The wine list had a good selection of South American offerings. The Argentinean chardonnay was crisp and un-oaked. All the entrees were very good and my grouper was the best I’ve had in a long time. Armando Pezzotti is the owner and you’re in the hands of serious host when even the breadbasket offerings are exceptional. I say try them all with the garlic butter spread they bring with the rolls. I’d say after 30 years in the business he’s got the formula down. Sure, the chips and salsa are first rate too, but try all the breads as well. I didn’t spot any sausage-based meals on this menu’s edition but let me know if you spot when you visit. In case you were wondering, La Habichuela translates into “bean”.

You can find out more about La Habichuela at: La Habichuela