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Notable Quotes and Sausage Relevant Observations

Notable Quotes and Sausage Relevant Observations

First, lets toss out the dubious quote often attributed to Otto Von Bismarck about sausage making and politics. There’s no reliable historical source that documents that “Gesetze sind wie Würste, man sollte besser nicht dabei sein, wenn sie gemacht warden” was ever uttered by Otto.

Now with that moldy old false fact put aside, we can bring to your attention some notable thoughts on sausage and the human condition.

“Lawsuit: a machine, which you go into as a pig and come out as a sausage.”
Ambrose Bierce

“Many men are like sausages; whatever you stuff them with, that they will bear in them.”
Aleksey Konstantinovich Tolstoy

“A party is like a sausage machine, it grinds up all sorts of heads together into the same baloney.”
Henrik Ibs...

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Quit Demeaning Sausage Making

Sausage Display at J & J Czuchraj Meats</a>, Cleveland, OH

Sausage Display at J & J Czuchraj Meats, Cleveland, OH

Opinion

It’s fine if MSNBC and FOX have a war of words over whose leading us to Armageddon. Given recent history there’s ample proof neither political party could even lead us to Armageddon successfully – so color us doubtful.

But, the never ending heat wave across the whole country, too much television (who wants go outside?), and political hyperbole around the deficit is a toxic cocktail that’s been slipped into our drinking supply.

The last two weeks in talks with the leadership from both sides of the aisle has worn me out from the sausage making process. It was ugly, perverse and disgusting.

–Kent Antonius, Editor & Publisher

I think these noxious cocktails are especially affecting the media folks you want to give us the in...

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Super Bowl Party Food Map

Wait, what? Chex Mix and Pinwheels?

Today the Sausage Feed featured an article by Jonathan Raymond about Super Bowl party foods. “It’s not wings: States’ favorite Super Bowl party foods revealed.” For those who may not know, The Sausage Feed is “Sausage News For Youse (Guys)” and features all kinds of articles about sausage. You never know what will appear there and it keeps updating so check it out regularly.

Anyway, the Super Bowl party food article caught my eye and now I think I’m getting the short end of the sausage stick, if you know what I mean! Our publisher, Kent Antonious, is flying down to Florida to take in the Super Bowl and to engage in high level sausage and wine talks with Dr Z, our awesome foodie friend and all-around great guy...

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Sausage Spaghetti Western: The Good, The Bad And The Ugly

Sausage Spaghetti Western: The Good, The Bad And The Ugly

To help get you in the proper frame of mind let’s start this off with the theme from “The Good, The Bad and The Ugly” by Hugo Montenegro and His Orchestra.

Recent sausage news brings to mind the iconic Spaghetti Western “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly.” It’s part of the Dollars Trilogy and stars Clint Eastwood and Eli Wallach. Per the IMDB Plot Summary “Blondie (The Good) is a professional gunslinger…Angel Eyes (The Bad) is a hit man…and Tucho (The Ugly) is a wanted outlaw.”

So Billy, what’s that have to do with sausage?

The Good: The Resourceful Butcher

A recent uplifting story featured in US News and World Report tells us about the resourceful butcher who, unfortunately, got locked in a freezer...

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Florida Iguana Rain

Further Frozen Floridan Fallout

According to this article from The Guardian by Julia Carrie Wong, “Extreme temperatures across the east coast are causing cold-blooded reptiles to ‘shut down’ in Florida, while elsewhere sharks and penguins are feeling the chill.”

So alligator lizards are falling from the air? Maybe I should write a song about that … sorry, too little, too late Billy! The band America already sang about that back in the seventies. You probably remember America. They’re the band who became famous singing about heat that was hot. People found it hard to disagree with that. Forty six years later and heat is still hot. Except in Florida. With frozen iguanas falling from the sky, it couldn’t have been very hot in Florida.

Besides the frigid temps, other ...

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Wall of Shame

Sausagefest Wall of Shame

As you might infer, we are extremely pro-sausage at Sausagefest.com. Simply put, we believe in sausage. And better wines. And good chocolate. Beer is great, too, especially craft beer not the mass produced domestic crap that dominated the market for generations.

We have very little tolerance for anti-sausage behaviors. We continuously monitor the sausage world and are on the lookout for threats to our sausage way of life. When extreme anti-sausage sentiment is detected, offenders will appear on the Sausagefest Wall of Shame.

At the top of the list is Bradford, England, a city where the sausage lifestyle is currently under siege. Bradford’s anti-sausage antics triggered the first-ever Sausagefest Travel Warning. Billy Bratzenbier describes the threat in detail in ...

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Sausagefest Travel Warning: Bradford, England

If You Love Sausage, Stay Away From Bradford, England

Here’s another disturbing story from across the pond and let me tell you, this one has Billy all lathered up! As a service to our visitors and to sausage lovers everywhere, we have issued our first “Sausagefest Travel Warning.

It has become abundantly clear that Bradford, England, is no longer a safe haven for sausage lovers. It’s not even safe for the birds! Within a short period of time and right before our eyes, Bradford has deteriorated into a sausage police state. While the U.S. State Department sits on its hands and watches, Bradford continues to inflict pain on its sausage loving citizens. Like a schoolyard bully, it won’t stop until someone stands up, pins it down and says “No more!”

Bradford’s latest acti...

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The Sausage Feed

Sausage News For Youse (Guys)

Check back regularly because the feed constantly refreshes.

The Sausage Feed

The latest "sausage news" from Google News!

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Yes, Virginia, There Is A Sausage Claus

From The “Don’t Look A Gift Sausage In The Mouth Department”

Florida family stumped after 15 pounds of sausage falls on house” is the title of this article from ABC15 News.

Earlier this year 15 pounds of frozen Italian sausage mysteriously fell on a family home in Florida. Was the sausage dropped from a plane? Did it fall out of a sleigh? Were Santa’s elves playing with slingshots at their annual summer barbecue a few doors down? It’s likely we’ll never know.

Whatever caused the family to suspect that their lucky meatfall was part of a drug deal is beyond me. If 15 pounds of sausage fell on my house, I’d take it as proof that Sausage Claus exists. Instead of firing up conspiracy theories, I’d fire up the grill but that’s just me, Billy Bratzenbier.

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The Tennis Star, The Butcher and The Sausage Baby

It’s About the Sausage, Baby

This Pedestrian article, entitled Scottish Butcher Celebrates Andy Murray’s Baby With Cursed Sausage Golem describes the unique way that Scottish butcher John Hill celebrated tennis star Andy Murray and his wife Kim’s newborn baby girl. Essentially, he created a sausage baby, so congrats to John Hill on the birth of his sausage baby. More sausage babies means more sausage and that’s a good thing.

The thing about sausage babies is that they make us smile unless they don’t. So how do you send best baby wishes to the parents of a new sausage baby?

  • 🌭 “A sausage baby changes you forever!”
  • 🌭 “Enjoy your sausage baby’s infancy!”
  • 🌭 “The joyful smile on your sausage baby will forever bring you happiness!”

Figuring out the proper sa...

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‘Tis the Season: Sausage Hope and Forgiveness, UK Style

The Advent season is upon us, a season of hope, forgiveness and salvation. Greggs, the UK’s largest bakery chain, is renowned for their sausage rolls. Now they have gained notoriety for their Advent calendar, which this year included a controversial ad featuring a sausage roll. Not just any sausage roll, mind you! This particular sausage roll was depicted lying in a manger, surrounded by wise men. Per this Time article, the “Bakery Apologizes for Replacing Jesus With a Sausage Roll in Nativity Scene.

Some customers took offense, so in the spirit of the season Greggs sought their own hope and forgiveness by issuing an apology. According to Greggs, they never intended to cause any offense by the ad.

It’s Not Over

End of story? Not quite. According to The Independent, a ...

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Sausage Search and Seizure — A Dark Day for Sausage

Warning: What follows is a disturbing sausage story from across the pond!

Last September Shirley Manor Primary Academy in Bradford, England, implemented a new policy which bans Sausage Rolls from packed lunches!

In this BBC News article, entitled “Bradford School bans sausage rolls from packed lunches,” we learn about the school’s anti-sausage stance:

Solar eclipse image

Photo by Justin Dickey on Unsplash

“The policy says pupils are encouraged to show their packed lunches to staff before and after they have eaten.

It states pork pies, sausage rolls and pepperoni sticks should not be included and neither should fruit squash or flavoured water.”

The school’s sausage police will call parents if banned items are found in packed lunches.

As you most likely guessed, it didn’t take long for ...

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