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Category Commentary

Sausage Search and Seizure — A Dark Day for Sausage

Warning: What follows is a disturbing sausage story from across the pond!

Last September Shirley Manor Primary Academy in Bradford, England, implemented a new policy which bans Sausage Rolls from packed lunches!

In this BBC News article, entitled “Bradford School bans sausage rolls from packed lunches,” we learn about the school’s anti-sausage stance:

Solar eclipse image

Photo by Justin Dickey on Unsplash

“The policy says pupils are encouraged to show their packed lunches to staff before and after they have eaten.

It states pork pies, sausage rolls and pepperoni sticks should not be included and neither should fruit squash or flavoured water.”

The school’s sausage police will call parents if banned items are found in packed lunches.

As you most likely guessed, it didn’t take long for ...

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Sausagefest Accolade

Dictionary definition from dictionary page

Sausage fest” was added to the Oxford English Dictionary earlier this year. While we are incredibly proud of this prestigious accolade, we take this opportunity to officially invite a few OED editors to join us at next year’s Sausagefest. Our hope is that by attending Sausagefest they will better understand the true meaning of Sausagefest and perhaps update their erroneous definition to include all genders and all lovers of sausage.

Still, it’s a great accomplishment, even though “cat lady,” “craptacular” and “haterade” were also added this year.

My personal favorite is: “In vino veritas: Under the influence of alcohol, a person tells the truth.” Next year they need to add​: “In sausage vino veritas: under the influence of sausage and wine, all bets are off.”

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Billy’s Brat Stand

Ya Hey Dere! You Wanted Kraut On That Brat, Ain’a?

Welcome to Billy’s Brat Stand, musings by Billy Bratzenbier.

Billy Bratzenbier is a roving Sausagefest.com editor and has been described as a “sausage guardian.” His rants, ramblings and sausage diatribes are archived in the posts below.

Microsoft Sausage Love

By Billy Bratzenbier Remembering "Hot Dog Stand" Once Upon A Time, A Long Time Ago Once upon a time, a long time ago, a company named Microsoft included a free ...
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Sausagefest Travel Warning: Adelaide, South Australia

By Billy Bratzenbier For The Love Of All Things Sausage, Avoid Adelaide! This recent news item from the land down under prompted us to issue y...

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Notable Quotes and Sausage Relevant Observations

Notable Quotes and Sausage Relevant Observations

First, lets toss out the dubious quote often attributed to Otto Von Bismarck about sausage making and politics. There’s no reliable historical source that documents that “Gesetze sind wie Würste, man sollte besser nicht dabei sein, wenn sie gemacht warden” was ever uttered by Otto.

Now with that moldy old false fact put aside, we can bring to your attention some notable thoughts on sausage and the human condition.

“Lawsuit: a machine, which you go into as a pig and come out as a sausage.”
Ambrose Bierce

“Many men are like sausages; whatever you stuff them with, that they will bear in them.”
Aleksey Konstantinovich Tolstoy

“A party is like a sausage machine, it grinds up all sorts of heads together...

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Quit Demeaning Sausage Making

Sausage Display at J & J Czuchraj Meats</a>, Cleveland, OH

Sausage Display at J & J Czuchraj Meats, Cleveland, OH

Opinion

It’s fine if MSNBC and FOX have a war of words over whose leading us to Armageddon. Given recent history there’s ample proof neither political party could even lead us to Armageddon successfully – so color us doubtful.

But, the never ending heat wave across the whole country, too much television (who wants go outside?), and political hyperbole around the deficit is a toxic cocktail that’s been slipped into our drinking supply.

The last two weeks in talks with the leadership from both sides of the aisle has worn me out from the sausage making process. It was ugly, perverse and disgusting.

–Kent Antonius, Editor & Publisher

I think these noxious cocktails are especially affecting the media folks you want to give us the in...

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